Monday, March 14, 2011

Monday = Snotday

As I sit at home on a Monday... with one baby in her crib, sick,covered in snot, and another baby sitting on the couch watching her beloved "Shrek"... I feel so happy for my girls.
Ali is turning out to be the sweetest little thing.  She is so thankful and kind and, I think, wise beyond her years.  She responds when I simply speak to her if she is being naughty (which I must remember because I do admit to yelling out of frustration way more than I should).   She tells me constantly: "thank you for making my life happy, Momma".  I mean, seriously- that is the nicest thing ANYONE in my life has ever said to me.  I make her life happy!  I make her feel glad and she loves ME!  That means so much to my soul.
Avery is just as fabulous.  At 10 months, her personality is starting to come through.. and I think we've got a little spitfire angel on our hands! She is quite opinionated and sassy.. but also very sweet and such a momma's girl (yes!).
And while I feel a bit guilty because I hate to miss work... I really am loving these precious moments with my girls.  I was reading this post over at a great blog called "The Little Brown House" today and it totally hit me in my heart.
Some days, I do get bored taking care of my girls and the monotony that comes with having a toddler and a baby.  Some days, I wish for my solidarity and freedom to be myself again. Some days, I find myself wishing for nap time or bedtime or wanting to go to work to have that ME time (ok- work isn't really ME time.. since I pretty much am a mom to 150 14-16 yr olds but you get it).
But other days, I find myself almost having a panic attack when I think about people saying "enjoy every moment, because you blink and they're grown"... and I don't want to blink and have my girls be grown! I want this time to go slow. I want to cherish every moment that I have with my girls and be thankful for it and love it.  I love them so much. They bring so much to my life and make me feel love..and loved.. beyond anything I could ever explain (if you're a mom you know what I'm talking about).  I just hope that I can drink in Every moment. Every memory. And not forget the little things- good and bad- about raising these girls. 
They are such a blessing to me. They warm up my heart and I just want to squeeze them until they are a part of me.  I hope they know that- even when I'm not the nicest mom- I hope they feel the depth of my love.

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