Tuesday, April 19, 2011

The Funk

...so I've kinda been M.I.A. on this blog for a bit of time... and I'm sure you are waiting with baited breath for me to tell you some really exciting or depressing or crazy dramatic reason why.  Well, be disappointed, people. Because unfortunately, my life isn't that awesome, or crazy, or dramatic.

I am, however, feeling like I am in a funk.  An emotional funk.  I'm feeling burnt out on my relationship with my husband.  Not like I want to leave him, or that I don't want to love him anymore or anything... not like that at all. But more like frustrated because everything that frustrates me, and has always frustrated me about him. still frustrates me.  And it never changes. And I don't know how to change it.  And that makes me feel like I'm in a never ending funk. 

I just don't know how to sort out my feelings and figure out how to feel better in my heart.  It's like I'm living with this personal push and pull and I'm not sure who to talk to about it or how to make it better. 
Oh, I hear you saying- talk to your husband!!  Duh! He's the one making you feel this way! He will understand, and work with you to make it better!  Riiiighhht.  The reason I don't talk to KK, is because I don't feel like fighting, and that is exactly what happens every single time that I try to express to him how I am feeling. 
And I suck at fighting.  I suck because I never say what I'm feeling- or I say it too bluntly, and end of either offending him, or making him defensive.  I guess I suck at expressing myself in a way that gets my point across, but doesn't come across as accusatory or condescending. 
So, that is why, my peeps, I'm stuck in a funk.
 And I don't know how to get out of it.


Yours Truly said...

Hope u're feeling better. A) U can't change anyone, so you'll never change him; B) The closer u r to someone, the more of their flaws u see, try to think of it as a privilege; C) Talk to a therapist, not ur husband. They're not only for crazies. Best of luck!

TootsieandFruitsie said...

I hope you feel better too. Its so hard when you are in a funk. I'm feeling kinda funky too.

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