Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
The Funk
...so I've kinda been M.I.A. on this blog for a bit of time... and I'm sure you are waiting with baited breath for me to tell you some really exciting or depressing or crazy dramatic reason why. Well, be disappointed, people. Because unfortunately, my life isn't that awesome, or crazy, or dramatic.
I am, however, feeling like I am in a funk. An emotional funk. I'm feeling burnt out on my relationship with my husband. Not like I want to leave him, or that I don't want to love him anymore or anything... not like that at all. But more like frustrated because everything that frustrates me, and has always frustrated me about him. still frustrates me. And it never changes. And I don't know how to change it. And that makes me feel like I'm in a never ending funk.
I just don't know how to sort out my feelings and figure out how to feel better in my heart. It's like I'm living with this personal push and pull and I'm not sure who to talk to about it or how to make it better.
Oh, I hear you saying- talk to your husband!! Duh! He's the one making you feel this way! He will understand, and work with you to make it better! Riiiighhht. The reason I don't talk to KK, is because I don't feel like fighting, and that is exactly what happens every single time that I try to express to him how I am feeling.
And I suck at fighting. I suck because I never say what I'm feeling- or I say it too bluntly, and end of either offending him, or making him defensive. I guess I suck at expressing myself in a way that gets my point across, but doesn't come across as accusatory or condescending.
So, that is why, my peeps, I'm stuck in a funk.
And I don't know how to get out of it.
I am, however, feeling like I am in a funk. An emotional funk. I'm feeling burnt out on my relationship with my husband. Not like I want to leave him, or that I don't want to love him anymore or anything... not like that at all. But more like frustrated because everything that frustrates me, and has always frustrated me about him. still frustrates me. And it never changes. And I don't know how to change it. And that makes me feel like I'm in a never ending funk.
I just don't know how to sort out my feelings and figure out how to feel better in my heart. It's like I'm living with this personal push and pull and I'm not sure who to talk to about it or how to make it better.
Oh, I hear you saying- talk to your husband!! Duh! He's the one making you feel this way! He will understand, and work with you to make it better! Riiiighhht. The reason I don't talk to KK, is because I don't feel like fighting, and that is exactly what happens every single time that I try to express to him how I am feeling.
And I suck at fighting. I suck because I never say what I'm feeling- or I say it too bluntly, and end of either offending him, or making him defensive. I guess I suck at expressing myself in a way that gets my point across, but doesn't come across as accusatory or condescending.
So, that is why, my peeps, I'm stuck in a funk.
And I don't know how to get out of it.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Save $$; Save Gas!
...I apologize for my lack of blogging lately (not that anyone has noticed)... I will return shortly to catch up on life in Jelli's World.. but for now... I want to pass on some much needed tips for saving gas from a great blog called Frugal Mom!
5 Easy Ways to Save at the Gas Pump
Unless you’ve been hiding away in some remote and exotic location, you are more than aware that gas prices are surging. Currently the average cost of gas per gallon is $4 nationwide, but experts suggest prices could continue to increase. Here are some simple tips to help you save a bundle on gas.
1. Go Green
Leave your car in the garage and practice green modes of transportation. Walking and bicycling are often practical alternatives to driving, not to mention great exercise. Use public transportation or carpool with friends and co-workers whenever possible.
2. Ease off the Lead foot
This might be a little difficult for those who are used to driving fast, but this is the easiest way to save on gas. Speedy drivers burn more fuel at a faster rate, so do your absolute best to drive the speed limit. In addition, anticipate your stops more effectively. Accelerating to high speeds and then breaking suddenly is also one of the easiest ways to waste fuel (many people stuck in traffic jams drive like this). If you see that there is a standstill ahead, simply release your foot off of the break so your vehicle naturally decelerates on its own. If you’re the type who happens to have a heavy foot, consider using cruise control—it helps you maintain a constant speed.
3. Lose the Excess Weight
Clean out your car and empty the trunk—you can keep your spare tire, but get rid of all the excess junk. The more your car weighs, the more you will need to accelerate to get the car going. Accelerating excessively burns gas at a quicker pace. Excess weight affects smaller vehicles more, but every bit helps.
4. Fill up in the Early A.M.
To get a better bang for your buck it’s generally best to not only fill up, but to do so in the morning. Gas is cooler in the mornings and therefore it is more dense. As the day warms up, the gas expands and becomes less concentrated. If you fill up your tank in the heat of the day, the gas can expand and potentially overflow.
5. Skip the A.C. and Turn off the Car
If the weather permits, crack open a window. Constantly using the A.C. eats up your gas in no time, so let in some fresh air. If you live in an area where turning off the A.C. is impossible, then at least park in a shaded area so your car doesn’t have to work so hard to cool down. It’s also a good idea to turn off your A.C. a few minutes before you reach your final destination. It’s equally important that you don’t leave your car idle—turn it completely off. According to experts, leaving your car idle for just 3 minutes can waste about a half-mile worth of fuel. Consider this when going through a packed fast food drive through.
Additional tips:
Always remember to use your shoppers discount card for additional savings.
Make sure your fuel cap is ok–you don’t want to risk losing gas due to evaporation.
Know the best gas prices. Gasbuddy.com is a great resource for finding the best prices in your area.
Know how many miles you have left when your gas light comes on. Visit TankonEmpty.com for more information–you might have far more than you think
5 Easy Ways to Save at the Gas Pump
Unless you’ve been hiding away in some remote and exotic location, you are more than aware that gas prices are surging. Currently the average cost of gas per gallon is $4 nationwide, but experts suggest prices could continue to increase. Here are some simple tips to help you save a bundle on gas.
1. Go Green
Leave your car in the garage and practice green modes of transportation. Walking and bicycling are often practical alternatives to driving, not to mention great exercise. Use public transportation or carpool with friends and co-workers whenever possible.
2. Ease off the Lead foot
This might be a little difficult for those who are used to driving fast, but this is the easiest way to save on gas. Speedy drivers burn more fuel at a faster rate, so do your absolute best to drive the speed limit. In addition, anticipate your stops more effectively. Accelerating to high speeds and then breaking suddenly is also one of the easiest ways to waste fuel (many people stuck in traffic jams drive like this). If you see that there is a standstill ahead, simply release your foot off of the break so your vehicle naturally decelerates on its own. If you’re the type who happens to have a heavy foot, consider using cruise control—it helps you maintain a constant speed.
3. Lose the Excess Weight
Clean out your car and empty the trunk—you can keep your spare tire, but get rid of all the excess junk. The more your car weighs, the more you will need to accelerate to get the car going. Accelerating excessively burns gas at a quicker pace. Excess weight affects smaller vehicles more, but every bit helps.
4. Fill up in the Early A.M.
To get a better bang for your buck it’s generally best to not only fill up, but to do so in the morning. Gas is cooler in the mornings and therefore it is more dense. As the day warms up, the gas expands and becomes less concentrated. If you fill up your tank in the heat of the day, the gas can expand and potentially overflow.
5. Skip the A.C. and Turn off the Car
If the weather permits, crack open a window. Constantly using the A.C. eats up your gas in no time, so let in some fresh air. If you live in an area where turning off the A.C. is impossible, then at least park in a shaded area so your car doesn’t have to work so hard to cool down. It’s also a good idea to turn off your A.C. a few minutes before you reach your final destination. It’s equally important that you don’t leave your car idle—turn it completely off. According to experts, leaving your car idle for just 3 minutes can waste about a half-mile worth of fuel. Consider this when going through a packed fast food drive through.
Additional tips:
Always remember to use your shoppers discount card for additional savings.
Make sure your fuel cap is ok–you don’t want to risk losing gas due to evaporation.
Know the best gas prices. Gasbuddy.com is a great resource for finding the best prices in your area.
Know how many miles you have left when your gas light comes on. Visit TankonEmpty.com for more information–you might have far more than you think
Monday, March 14, 2011
Monday = Snotday
As I sit at home on a Monday... with one baby in her crib, sick,covered in snot, and another baby sitting on the couch watching her beloved "Shrek"... I feel so happy for my girls.
Ali is turning out to be the sweetest little thing. She is so thankful and kind and, I think, wise beyond her years. She responds when I simply speak to her if she is being naughty (which I must remember because I do admit to yelling out of frustration way more than I should). She tells me constantly: "thank you for making my life happy, Momma". I mean, seriously- that is the nicest thing ANYONE in my life has ever said to me. I make her life happy! I make her feel glad and she loves ME! That means so much to my soul.
Avery is just as fabulous. At 10 months, her personality is starting to come through.. and I think we've got a little spitfire angel on our hands! She is quite opinionated and sassy.. but also very sweet and such a momma's girl (yes!).
And while I feel a bit guilty because I hate to miss work... I really am loving these precious moments with my girls. I was reading this post over at a great blog called "The Little Brown House" today and it totally hit me in my heart.
Some days, I do get bored taking care of my girls and the monotony that comes with having a toddler and a baby. Some days, I wish for my solidarity and freedom to be myself again. Some days, I find myself wishing for nap time or bedtime or wanting to go to work to have that ME time (ok- work isn't really ME time.. since I pretty much am a mom to 150 14-16 yr olds but you get it).
But other days, I find myself almost having a panic attack when I think about people saying "enjoy every moment, because you blink and they're grown"... and I don't want to blink and have my girls be grown! I want this time to go slow. I want to cherish every moment that I have with my girls and be thankful for it and love it. I love them so much. They bring so much to my life and make me feel love..and loved.. beyond anything I could ever explain (if you're a mom you know what I'm talking about). I just hope that I can drink in every.single.day. Every moment. Every memory. And not forget the little things- good and bad- about raising these girls.
They are such a blessing to me. They warm up my heart and I just want to squeeze them until they are a part of me. I hope they know that- even when I'm not the nicest mom- I hope they feel the depth of my love.
Ali is turning out to be the sweetest little thing. She is so thankful and kind and, I think, wise beyond her years. She responds when I simply speak to her if she is being naughty (which I must remember because I do admit to yelling out of frustration way more than I should). She tells me constantly: "thank you for making my life happy, Momma". I mean, seriously- that is the nicest thing ANYONE in my life has ever said to me. I make her life happy! I make her feel glad and she loves ME! That means so much to my soul.
Avery is just as fabulous. At 10 months, her personality is starting to come through.. and I think we've got a little spitfire angel on our hands! She is quite opinionated and sassy.. but also very sweet and such a momma's girl (yes!).
And while I feel a bit guilty because I hate to miss work... I really am loving these precious moments with my girls. I was reading this post over at a great blog called "The Little Brown House" today and it totally hit me in my heart.
Some days, I do get bored taking care of my girls and the monotony that comes with having a toddler and a baby. Some days, I wish for my solidarity and freedom to be myself again. Some days, I find myself wishing for nap time or bedtime or wanting to go to work to have that ME time (ok- work isn't really ME time.. since I pretty much am a mom to 150 14-16 yr olds but you get it).
But other days, I find myself almost having a panic attack when I think about people saying "enjoy every moment, because you blink and they're grown"... and I don't want to blink and have my girls be grown! I want this time to go slow. I want to cherish every moment that I have with my girls and be thankful for it and love it. I love them so much. They bring so much to my life and make me feel love..and loved.. beyond anything I could ever explain (if you're a mom you know what I'm talking about). I just hope that I can drink in every.single.day. Every moment. Every memory. And not forget the little things- good and bad- about raising these girls.
They are such a blessing to me. They warm up my heart and I just want to squeeze them until they are a part of me. I hope they know that- even when I'm not the nicest mom- I hope they feel the depth of my love.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Sweet Blog!
I bought a super cute ring for super cheap from Pursenickety about 3 weeks ago for a friend's birthday... the ring is adorable and now everybody wants one (according to my friend). So I wanted to share the blog with you, plus she's currently holding a giveaway! Checkity check it! They've got purses, necklaces, and other cute stuff!
Blessings
I am participating in a (much needed) "Blessings" blogpost project from Marla over at Blue Skies Photography. "Each week, we will post a list of our blessings, along with at least one picture. I want Wednesday to become a day where we reflect on our lives and realize we truly are blessed even when things are rough."
So here is my list of blessings for today.
1. My job. Although I am disheartened at the current state of education in Idaho, I still thank God that I have a job that provides me an income, as well as health insurance. Besides all the politics that come with education, I do love my students and my workplace, and the people I work with, very much
2. My sweet baby girls. They are so happy and healthy and smart, and they make my heart happy every moment that I think of them.
3. My hubs. We have a stable marriage, and we are in love. And for that, I am immeasurably grateful.
4. And this week especially, I am so blessed with my Daddy. He recently retired from his law practice after 34 years. We are celebrating his life's work on Friday. He's the best.
So here is my list of blessings for today.
1. My job. Although I am disheartened at the current state of education in Idaho, I still thank God that I have a job that provides me an income, as well as health insurance. Besides all the politics that come with education, I do love my students and my workplace, and the people I work with, very much
2. My sweet baby girls. They are so happy and healthy and smart, and they make my heart happy every moment that I think of them.
3. My hubs. We have a stable marriage, and we are in love. And for that, I am immeasurably grateful.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
A heavy heart
Today, in Idaho, the state in which my husband and I both teach and plan (or planned?) to raise our family... some legislation was passed similiar to what is happening in Wisconsin. Our legislation passed a bill taht will essentially take all teachers' job security away It will take away due process, tenure, as well as our right to negotiate salary and working environment. Here is a sickingly true spoof I copied from a teacher/blogger in the southern half of my state:
If all of these bills pass then I think that I will have captured the essence of the future outcomes in the following Teacher Recruitment Ad.
IDAHO TEACHERS NEEDED–COME TO BEAUTIFUL IDAHO WHERE CORPORATE AMERICA RATES …FIRST–TEACHERS WILL ENJOY THE FOLLOWING BENEFITS AND CHALLENGES
BEGINNING SALARY OF $30,000/YEAR WITH NO ANTICIPATED INCREASES FOR SIX YEARS. YOU AND YOUR FAMILY MAY QUALIFY FOR FOOD STAMPS, MEDICADE, AND FREE OR REDUCEd SCHOOL LUNCHES.
ENJOY THE CHALLENGE OF NEEDING TO WORK AT ONE OR TWO MORE JOBS IN ORDER TO SUPPORT YOUR FAMILY.
EXPERIENCE THE CHALLENGE OF LARGE SIZE CLASSES WITH FIVE OR SIX SPECIAL NEEDS STUDENTS IN THE MIX.
N RURAL DISTRICTS YOUR CONTRACT MIGHT BE TERMINATED IN EARLY OCTOBER IF DISTRICT FUNDING IS CUT.
IN CASE OF DISPUTES ARISING FROM YOUR ASSIGNMENT YOU HAVE NO DUE PROCESS PROTECTION.
UNDER PAY FOR PERFORMANCE YOU ARE HELD ONE HUDRED PERCENT ACCOUNTABLE FOR IMPROVING STUDENT PERFORMANCE. I
IN YOUR SPARE TIME YOU CAN LISTEN TO INSPIRATIONAL SPEECHES BY OUR SUPERINTENDENT OF PUBLIC INSTRUCTION.
CONTRIBUTE TO HELPING MOVING IDAHO INTO A THIRD WORLD EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM.
FOR FURTHER INFORMATION CONTACT THE IDAHO SPI–BUT SEND A SELF ADDRESSED AND STAMPED ENVELOPE.
My heart hurts. I do not know at this point what the future holds for my family. I am uncertain of what moves I or KK need to take in order to ensure we can pay all our bills and keep our family afloat. Please pray for all of us. Pray that I continue to put my faith in God's plan for my life.
If all of these bills pass then I think that I will have captured the essence of the future outcomes in the following Teacher Recruitment Ad.
IDAHO TEACHERS NEEDED–COME TO BEAUTIFUL IDAHO WHERE CORPORATE AMERICA RATES …FIRST–TEACHERS WILL ENJOY THE FOLLOWING BENEFITS AND CHALLENGES
BEGINNING SALARY OF $30,000/YEAR WITH NO ANTICIPATED INCREASES FOR SIX YEARS. YOU AND YOUR FAMILY MAY QUALIFY FOR FOOD STAMPS, MEDICADE, AND FREE OR REDUCEd SCHOOL LUNCHES.
ENJOY THE CHALLENGE OF NEEDING TO WORK AT ONE OR TWO MORE JOBS IN ORDER TO SUPPORT YOUR FAMILY.
EXPERIENCE THE CHALLENGE OF LARGE SIZE CLASSES WITH FIVE OR SIX SPECIAL NEEDS STUDENTS IN THE MIX.
N RURAL DISTRICTS YOUR CONTRACT MIGHT BE TERMINATED IN EARLY OCTOBER IF DISTRICT FUNDING IS CUT.
IN CASE OF DISPUTES ARISING FROM YOUR ASSIGNMENT YOU HAVE NO DUE PROCESS PROTECTION.
UNDER PAY FOR PERFORMANCE YOU ARE HELD ONE HUDRED PERCENT ACCOUNTABLE FOR IMPROVING STUDENT PERFORMANCE. I
IN YOUR SPARE TIME YOU CAN LISTEN TO INSPIRATIONAL SPEECHES BY OUR SUPERINTENDENT OF PUBLIC INSTRUCTION.
CONTRIBUTE TO HELPING MOVING IDAHO INTO A THIRD WORLD EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM.
FOR FURTHER INFORMATION CONTACT THE IDAHO SPI–BUT SEND A SELF ADDRESSED AND STAMPED ENVELOPE.
My heart hurts. I do not know at this point what the future holds for my family. I am uncertain of what moves I or KK need to take in order to ensure we can pay all our bills and keep our family afloat. Please pray for all of us. Pray that I continue to put my faith in God's plan for my life.
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